Serj Tankian : Elect The Dead Symphony :: Review

On paper, heavy metal and symphonic music would be a match made in heaven almost akin to peanut butter and chocolate.  Both forms of music are somewhat dark and theatrical while also appealing to teenage fantasies so it would make sense that a heavy metal musician would want to heighten the drama of their music by incorporating a symphony into their tunes.  However these musical forms are so disparate that when combined the result is a musical concoction so horrendous it only succeeds on making dogs nervous.  So many metal musicians have tried and failed at this stylistic merge that you would think that someone might nudge Serj Tankian of System of a Down fame and tell him that recording a middling solo effort with a symphony is a really bad idea. Apparently no one remembers the abhorrent Metallica’s “S&M.”

Thankfully someone wanted Mr. Tankian to fail miserably and forcibly reunite with System of a Down so the abomination known as “Elect The Dead Symphony” became a reality. Serj Tankian’s “Elect The Dead Symphony” is a laughably overwrought and dramatic album that makes me pity the Auckland Philharmonia Orchestra for backing what appears to be a self-important egomaniac with a penchant for unintentionally funny high pitched vocal ticks. System of a Down’s material almost seems subtle when compared to this hammy performance.  “Elect The Dead Symphony” is an endurance test of unbearable proportions which borderlines on parody.

“Elect The Dead Symphony” is cartoonish and whatever point was made on Tankian’s original solo effort is lost on this debacle.  “Lie, Lie, Lie” is guaranteed to make you guffaw and almost caused me to choke on iced tea as I was typing this review.  The dangers of music blogging are evident but I don’t think many people have succumbed to asphyxiation due to ice tea and Serj Tankian Symphonies.  “Gate 21” also makes me wonder about this album because the audience sounds dubbed in.   Who in their right mind can applaud this shit?  The audience might be applauding for Tankian to leave the stage as I would if I had the misfortune of attending this event.  Avoid this album like the plague unless you enjoy listening to train wrecks.

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