The Lost Boys Should Not Have Been Found: Lost Boys 2 – The Tribe *UPDATED*
I almost wanted to like the Lost Boys 2 – The Tribe. I was feeling kind of nolstalgic when I first heard that it was being released, and then I heard that Corey Haim and Corey Feldman were both going to be in it. That really got me jazzed for revisiting my wasted youth in the 1980′s. Well, it turns out that Corey Feldman and Corey Haim are both back for this sequel for a total of 35 minutes. Corey Feldman gets about 30 minutes of face time and Corey Haim gets about a minute. More about that later.
The plot, when there is one, follows the original almost to a tee. To set the scene so you know you’re watching a movie about vampires, a brutal vampire attack occurs on a misty shore of a mansion overlooking the ocean. Once the mansion owner is disposed of, the attackers who happen to be surfers/vampires can use his home as a base to throw wild parties. I’m assuming that throwing parties and surfing are two things that vampires like to do.
The story then moves to the main characters, Chris and his sister Nicole who are moving out to creepy Southern California in a station wagon. It turns out their parents are dead, and Chris wants to hide from his surfing past. Why Chris wants to hide from his surfing past is never explained. That would be too much exposition, for the writers, I assume. Chris and Nicole shack up with his aunt at a house and decide that’s where they’ll stay that summer. Later that day, Nicole meets a cute emo boy named Evan on the boardwalk and Chris goes in search of Edgar Frog (Corey Feldman) to have his surfboard reshaped.
Nicole gets an invite to a party, at the mansion where the vampires are by Evan. Chris and Nicole both attend the party and it’s like no other. It’s quite possibly the most retarded party in the entire world. I guess I’m lame because I’ve never been to a party where there’s a belly dancer or a fantastic dj playing all the hits. Chris has eyes for the belly dancer but is shy. Nicole has eyes for Shane (Angus Sutherland), the lead vampire. I have a complaint against this actor. I don’t know if I’m half deaf, but this guy can’t act for one thing, and secondly, he speaks with such a speech impediment that it makes all of his dialogue unbearable. I know he’s Kiefer’s 1/2 brother, and at times he looks the part, but he sounded like Mushmouth from Fat Albert. The speech impediment detracted away from his cool factor a lot.
Things get going at the party, Chris ends up naked and dry humping the belly dancer in the shower and Nicole starts messing around with Shane. All of sudden, Chris hears his sister squeal as she begins riding Shane’s motorcycle. This premonition causes Chris to stop dry humping the hot belly dancer girl as he says, “I have to leave!” “My sister is in trouble!” Lame. What a dork. At this point, I wanted to turn the dvd off, but I continued to watch because I predicted that Nicole would sample some of Shane’s wine/blood and turn into a vampire.
Whoops, I won’t ruin the rest of the movie for those that have an itch to see it. The rest of the movie follows formula and Chris vows to save his sister from having fun and staying young. Do the puritan values of Chris and his bland world win in the end? Watch and see. I will have to say that they didn’t try too hard to really enhance the Lost Boys saga. As for Corey Feldman’s acting ability, don’t expect too much. He wasn’t Keanu Reeves bad, but he seemed to be sleepwalking through this role. Also, if you skip the end credits, you’ll miss Corey Haim which depending on your point of view may not be such a bad thing.
UPDATED – 8/01/08
I saw a couple arguing over the Lost Boys 2 DVD at Walmart today! The boyfriend had the disc in his hand and was asking his lady friend if Kiefer Sutherland was in the film. She said something like, “I don’t knows.” She actually said, “I don’t knows!!!!” What a moment for me. It made going to Walmart all the more bearable.
-
http://www.happymeal.com Butters_Stotch
